Happiness doesn't always come easy for some people... sometimes you have to work on it. Somedays it is force smiles and fake laughs, other days it comes natural. This article comes from the Mayoclinic.com and discusses steps to bring happiness into your life... yes, you can learn to be happy or at least happier. I hope this can be a silver lining in your day. Know that you don't have go through life being unhappy, we all have choices, we all have options and we all have help if we just ask for it. Much Love, Bridget!
How to be happy:
Tips for Cultivating Contentment
Are you tired of waiting around
for happiness to find you? Stop waiting and start getting happy with these
tips.
Do you know how to be happy? Or
are you waiting for happiness to find you? Despite what the fairy tales depict,
happiness doesn't appear by magic. It's not even something that happens to you.
It's something you can cultivate. So, what are you waiting for? Start
discovering how to be happy.
How to be happy: What science
tells us
Only 10 percent or so of the
variation in people's reports of happiness can be explained by differences in
their circumstances. The bulk of what determines happiness is your personality
and — more modifiable — your thoughts and behaviors. So, yes, you can learn how
to be happy — or at least happier.
Although you may have thought, as
many people do, that happiness comes from being born rich or beautiful or
living a stress-free life, the reality is that those things don't confer
lasting happiness. Indeed, how to be happy can't be boiled down to one thing.
Happiness is the sum of your life choices. People who are happy seem to
intuitively know this, and their lives are built on the following pillars:
Devoting time to
family and friends
Appreciating what
they have
Maintaining an
optimistic outlook
Feeling a sense of
purpose
Living in the moment
How to be happy: Practice,
practice, practice
The good news is that your
choices, thoughts and actions can influence your level of happiness. It's not
as easy as flipping a switch, but you can turn up your happiness level. Here's
how to get started on the path to creating a happier you.
Invest in relationships
Surround yourself with happy
people. Being around people who are content buoys your own mood. And by being
happy yourself, you give something back to those around you.
Friends and family help you
celebrate life's successes and support you in difficult times. Although it's
easy to take friends and family for granted, these relationships need
nurturing. Build up your emotional account with kind words and actions. Be
careful and gracious with critique. Let people know that you appreciate what
they do for you or even just that you're glad they're part of your life.
Express gratitude
Gratitude is more than saying
thank you. It's a sense of wonder, appreciation and, yes, thankfulness for
life. It's easy to go through life without recognizing your good fortune.
Often, it takes a serious illness or other tragic event to jolt people into appreciating
the good things in their lives. Don't wait for something like that to happen to
you.
Make a commitment to practice
gratitude. Each day identify at least one thing that enriches your life. When
you find yourself thinking an ungrateful thought, try substituting a grateful
one. For example, replace "my sister forgot my birthday" with
"my sister has always been there for me in tough times." Let
gratitude be the last thought before you go off to sleep. Let gratitude also be
your first thought when you wake up in the morning.
Cultivate optimism
Develop the habit of seeing the
positive side of things. You needn't become a Pollyanna — after all, bad things
do happen, and it would be silly to pretend otherwise. But you don't have to
let the negatives color your whole outlook on life. Remember that what is right
about you almost always trumps what is wrong about you.
If you're not an optimistic
person by nature, it may take time for you to change your pessimistic thinking.
Start by recognizing negative thoughts as you have them. Then take a step back
and ask yourself these key questions:
Is the situation
really as bad as I think?
Is there another way
to look at the situation?
What can I learn
from this experience that I can use in the future?
Find your purpose
People who strive to meet a goal
or fulfill a mission — whether it's growing a garden, caring for children or
finding one's spirituality — are happier than those who don't have such
aspirations. Having a goal provides a sense of purpose, bolsters self-esteem
and brings people together. What your goal is doesn't matter as much as whether
the process of working toward it is meaningful to you. Try to align your daily
activities with the long-term meaning and purpose of your life. Research studies
suggest that relationships provide the strongest meaning and purpose to your
life. So cultivate meaningful relationships.
Are you engaged in something you
love? If not, ask yourself these questions to discover how you can find your
purpose:
What excites and
energizes me?
What are my proudest
achievements?
How do I want others
to remember me?
Live in the moment
Don't postpone joy waiting for a
day when your life is less busy or less stressful. That day may never come.
Instead, look for opportunities to savor the small pleasures of everyday life.
Focus on the positives in the present moment. Don't spend your time rehashing
the past or worrying about the future. Take time to stop and smell the flowers.
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